So today is Wednesday the day before my birthday, I need to back track to Sunday the 12th of June. I woke us roughly around 8:30am and started watching tv wasn't really paying attention to what was being said or anything. I got up and got ready for going to the buddhist temple that I had planned to go with Martin ,but he decided he wanted to spend his first Sunday off mostly relaxing. Which was perfectly fine I let him sleep in.
This was my first experience in a buddhist temple of any sort, slightly excited and very nervous. I drove there whilst thinking about up and turning around or just going to the gym instead. Once I got there and went around the building to find which entrance I needed to take. I took my shoes off before entering the small room that the temple was in. Looking around there were mostly people my age, which was perfectly fine I wanted to explore my new practice. I spoke with no one i went to the front of the temple and bowed 6 times and found a seat next to a lady in very beautiful garb. I truly loved the service and it wasn't fancy or well rehearsed by any means but it was a small group of individuals following the middle way.
The last half of the service was my favorite part, mantra and silent meditation. by the end of it my third eye was warm and felt wide open. I felt at peace with everything in my life, I have not been the same since either. I feel like my true self with only noticing my anxiety and not riding the wave of it. everything else this week is only a reflection of Sunday. it is continuing to raise my mindfulness and I plan on going back this next Sunday. I am doing my best to not attach myself to that feeling I just want to accept that sometimes my practice will be easy like it is right now and sometimes it will be hard like it has in the past.
Part of my practice is to push through the hard time and accept that the easy times wont all ways be here, for the world and universe is all ways changing and I am that much closer to only having positive thoughts. I hope that I can spread the positive outlook to others and with the masses we can change the world. There has been a lot of crazy things happening in the world. Orlando I have not forgotten you and I never will, I hope this experience will help you all to become stronger and not set you back. I send you my Love and caring energies and I feel your pain. I have cried for all the beautiful souls that we as a nation and as LGBT Community have lost.
If there is anything I could have done to stop such a horrible act from happening I would give my life to save just one let alone all 50 lives that have been lost thus far, and hopefully no more will have this fate. Here in Saint Louis MO, we will be celebrating Pride month next week and honoring all the beautiful souls lost.
So as you can see in this article this week has been a one were I have been greatly happy for my experience in my buddhist practice and yet saddened by the event that have also came with it.
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